another doctor appointment today. i write down the wrong time for the appointment and almost have to reschedule because i show up fifteen minutes late. thankfully they squeeze me in. today's appointment is answering more questions about personal and family medical history, then a quick exam. easy-peasy.
at the end of the exam, the nurse practitioner asks if i want to try to hear the heartbeat. she says it is still a little early, but we'll try anyway. of course i consent because this past month has been filled with worry that something is wrong and it is still early, and what if...? she get's out the doppler, squirts some gel on my skin and presses the wand to my stomach. after a few seconds she finds it: a quick wave sound that is my baby's heartbeat. the relief that my baby is alive and has a strong healthy heartbeat is overpowering, as is the feeling that my baby is now not just a concept; there is physical auditory proof that the baby exists and is developing. it's a wonderful feeling.
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